Recode Your Language, Rewire Your Identity - BONUS DAY
Your words don’t just describe your reality. They shape it.
(A special thank you to Rosemary who supported my work through my Ko-fi today. It’s very meaningful to the support as I start this new journey doing what I love.)
The 5-Day People Pleaser Reset(Bonus Day)
By William Thorfinn
You’ve done the emotional work.
You’ve felt the fear.
You’ve spoken your truth.
You’ve breathed through the guilt.
You’ve chosen yourself.
But there’s one place where people-pleasing still hides.
Where it lives in plain sight.
Your words.
The way you speak, even when you’re not thinking about it, reveals your deepest conditioning.
The little phrases.
The softeners.
The apologies.
The disclaimers.
The tone that says, “I hope this is okay.”
The words we speak reflect and shape our inner world.
Every softener, every doubt phrase, every apology we don’t mean sends a signal to our body that says:
Shrink.
Hide.
Don’t trust yourself.
These words don’t just express the pattern.
They reinforce it.
They keep the fear alive.
They keep the truth small.
It’s time to break that loop.
To speak like someone who trusts themselves.
To let your language match the power you’ve been stepping into.
Let’s recode it.
POWER LANGUAGE RECODE LIST
From survival speech to embodied clarity
These are not grammar tips.
This is nervous system work.
Your words are rituals.
They shape how your body feels, how others respond to you, and who you believe yourself to be.
❌ 1. “Maybe…”
Signals: Fear of commitment or rejection
Recode:
Yes.
No.
Let me get clear and I’ll decide.
That’s not aligned right now.
❌ 2. “I think…”
Signals: Fear of being judged for knowing
Recode:
I know this.
What I see is…
Here’s the truth as I feel it.
❌ 3. “I don’t know…”
Signals: Collapse of inner leadership
Recode:
I’m clarifying that now.
Let me check in.
That’s still integrating.
I’m deciding soon.
❌ 4. “I might / I’ll try / We’ll see…”
Signals: Exit doors, lack of energetic claim
Recode:
I will.
I’m committed to this.
This is happening.
I’m choosing this.
❌ 5. “Sorry” (when no harm was done)
Signals: Preemptive guilt, fear of being too much
Recode:
Thanks for waiting.
I appreciate your patience.
Silence. You don’t need to apologize for existing.
❌ 6. “Thank you for [everything]” (overused)
Signals: Subtle guilt for receiving
Recode:
I appreciate that.
Grateful.
Thank you — clean and felt.
❌ 7. “Does that make sense?” / “If that’s okay…”
Signals: Seeking permission, validation
Recode:
Here’s what I’m saying.
Let me know how that lands.
This is what’s true for me.
❌ 8. “Just checking in…”
Signals: Soft entry to avoid rejection
Recode:
Wanted to follow up on this.
Quick update.
Here’s where I’m at.
SPEECH AUDIT RITUAL
Each night or before bed, replay one conversation from the day.
Ask:
Where did I dilute my truth?
Where did I lead with clarity?
Where did I monitor or soften?
Now re-speak one of those moments as your Future Self.
From breath.
From body.
From boldness.
Then close with:
“I speak with clarity, direction, and power. My word shapes my world.”
This Is How You Finish
You’ve rewired your nervous system.
Now you reclaim your voice.
Because people-pleasing doesn’t just live in emotion.
It lives in speech.
And when you shift your language,
You shift your life.
No more shrinking.
No more softening truth so it’s easier to swallow.
No more asking for permission just to exist.
You were not born to be vague.
You were born to be clear.
Speak like someone who knows who they are.
Speak like someone who trusts what they feel.
Speak like someone who is done waiting.
Let the world adjust.
All the best,
Will
If this work speaks to you and you are ready to go deeper,
I offer 1:1 coaching focused on nervous system healing, emotional clarity, and total identity transformation. I don’t just coach this, I’ve lived it.
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Great article. It was very enlightening! Thank you for sharing!